Welcome to my Practice
About Ray
For over two decades, I have dedicated my career to helping individuals and couples navigate the complexities of relationships, trauma, and emotional healing. My treatment approach is grounded firmly in the Internal Family Systems Psychotherapy Model, a modern, transformative model that recognizes the human mind as a system of discrete parts that carry us through life and inform both primary attachment relationships, and critically, our relationship to ourselves.
As a Level 3 Certified IFS therapist and an IFS-I approved clinical consultant, I provide direct care to clients, and I consult with licensed mental health professionals as they work toward IFS certification.
My introduction to IFS was an intuitive turning point in my career in June, 2007 at the annual trauma conference in Boston. Dr. Richard Schwartz presented a session in which he stated:
Tell the part you hear it and ask the part to tell you more…
I knew instantly that this was how I wanted to work. Since then, I have been emersed in the IFS community—completing certification through Level 3, assisting with multiple Level 1 & 2 trainings, and assisting for IFIO (Intimacy from the Inside Out). As an approved clinical consultant and certified therapist, in an effort to refine both skillsets and stay current in IFS-I certification requirements, I participate in monthly supervision with two IFS lead trainers.
Ray Howard, LICSW
Approved Clinical Consultant for IFS Certification 2023
Certified IFS Psychotherapist 2010
IFS-I Program Assistant 2009-present
IFIO Program Assistant 2022-present
NH License 1335
Smith College School for Social Work 1997
University of Massachusetts 1995
Trauma, IFS, & Our True Nature
Throughout my career, I have worked extensively with individuals who have experienced developmental trauma, neglect, and abandonment, all of which impact our primary attachment relationships. Trauma introduces anxiety, depression, addictions, to name just a few, and it cuts us off from our true nature, which is characterized by love for others and for ourselves. With IFS psychotherapy we connect to our true nature. When this happens, we are self-led, we are calm, clear, confident, connected to self and others, compassionate to self and others, courageous, curious, creative, and we have choice (the 9 C’s of IFS). When we are self-led, we naturally experience patience, presence, perseverance, playfulness, and keep life events in perspective (the 5 P’s of IFS). IFS provides a logical, consistent, predictable method to experience self-leadership, both in therapeutic hour and in private life.
Email: rayhoward@ifsacc.com
Secure Attachment & The Internal Family System
IFS views the human mind as a system of parts or personalities and the focus of therapy is the relationship between you and your parts. IFS is an attachment-based model that promotes a secure attachment between the individual and their parts. When this occurs, we are more able to establish and maintain a secure attachment to the people we love. Secure attachment and connection are fundamental to the IFS healing process.
I live in New Hampshire and love hiking in the White Mountains any time of year with my wife of twenty eight years and our two sons.
I really enjoyed working with Raymond. He was phenomenal during practice sessions. He did a great job of working with the client’s system to prepare it for the therapist and manage expectations that the client may have around healing reminding them that the space is for the therapist to explore and learn. He also did an amazing job working with therapist parts before starting the practice sessions to address any parts that may be activated and in the way of Self. This allowed for such a rich experience in understanding therapist parts and seeing how much better the session can go once therapist part’s are addressed and there is more Self on board. He did a great job taking notes, reflecting what the therapist did well, and supporting the overall learning.
I worked with Ray in two different practice triads and he was very focused, very attuned to the needs of learners coming into practice after some deeply felt full-group work.
Ray was really valuable in small groups. He was very skilled at making the focus on the therapist and helping the therapist unblend/providing a lot of helpful feedback. He was very quick to apologize for a mistake, without explaining or being defensive, which was very healing for my parts. It’s clear he really embodies and knows the model. Was grateful to have him for small group!
We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.
–Albert Einstein
